Sighing, I rest my hand against the bark, rubbing my hand over the dead patch where my beloved hanyou once rested. Spring time always bummed me out, because it was in the spring that I met him. When I freed him from the Goshinboku, and soon after fell in love with him and those adorable puppy ears. Smiling at the memory, I sigh once more and sit against the tree.

I know he's in a better place. I know that he's watching over me... no, he's probably kissing her spirit. I know that I'm her reincarnation, but ever since she was reborn, I never felt whole, not even when she died. Part of her soul never returned to me. However, during the final battle with Naraku, my beloved was killed trying to protect me.

Thinking back, I wish so badly that I could have told him how I felt. I wish I didn't “sit” him so often, and send him plummeting into the ground. I wish that it was all a dream, that he'd jump through the well and shout, “Oi, wench, where the hell have you been?!” But, I know that'll never happen. He's gone, and I know I have to move on with my life.

But, still... it's so hard to imagine life, love, happiness, anything... without him. Sighing, I recall a song by an American group called the Dixie Chicks, called “Without You”.

Without you I'm not okay
And without you
I've lost my way
My heart's stuck
In second place, ooh
Without you

Sighing, I know I could really relate to that song. It was so sad, too. Raising my head as the clouds open up to let the rain through, I smile. As much as I'm without him now,  though, maybe I'll see him again. Someday...